


mauerbauertraurigkeit

by mintables



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: M/M, YOUR TYPICAL ANGST BC THIS WHOLE SHIP IS JUST ANGST, chapter 13 spoilers, let my son have his boyfriend back intsys theyre both so sad, sO WHO ELSE IS SOBBING OVER THE NEW HEROES CHAPTER, the title means the urge to push people away im googling things shh, we all need so much more zachfonse content im sorry this is so short
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-17
Updated: 2017-09-17
Packaged: 2018-12-31 00:21:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12120498
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mintables/pseuds/mintables
Summary: Alfonse can't just let Zacharias walk away without a word again after all these months.(chapter 13 really needs a sappier ending than what we were left off with, after all)





	mauerbauertraurigkeit

**Author's Note:**

> zachfonse is the reason i can't sleep at night why are they so SAD

Alfonse can’t make himself believe what’s happening.

He’s only just gotten Zacharias back; he can’t watch himself lose him again, can’t handle the constant worry that he’s going to be out there alone fighting a curse he should never have had to deal with. His head is still spinning from the shock of Zacharias’s admission- gods,  _ why hadn’t he told him? _

He knows why, of course; Zacharias has always been too selfless for his own good. And-

-although he had doubted this for months after he’d left, had spent countless nights sobbing behind closed doors, trying to forget the heartbreak, although he  _ still _ wonders-

-he had loved him. Might  _ still _ love him. 

Alfonse isn’t sure if he can handle this.

He can only feel terror swell in him when Zacharias sighs, refusing Anna’s offer of help. “I have no choice but to return to Embla. You should head back to Askr.”

Sharena speaks before Alfonse can, and he is grateful for it; grateful he won’t choke on the tears that are swelling fast. “Can’t you come with us?” She is upset too, voice almost breaking, but she seems to be handling it better than he is. She always does.

Zacharias sighs, and Alfonse tries to pretend his heart isn’t breaking more and more with every word. “I am sorry, Sharena. I cannot. Before long, I will try to kill you.” His lips curl into a sad smile, so reminiscent of the brave face he used to put on whenever he wanted to hide hurt from Alfonse. He’s so transparent to him, even now. “I will stop seeking my own death. I will resume my search across the realms… There must be a path that leads to freedom.”

He turns to Kiran, and she flinches back a little. She barely knows him, but Alfonse can still see the glint of tears in her eyes; she’s always been too easily attached for her own good.

He had been too, once.

“I’m counting on you to look after my friends, Kiran,” Zacharias tells her, and she nods shakily. “And if I ever make another attempt on Alfonse or Sharena’s life… Kill me. Consider it my last request.”

His heart leaps to his throat, and Alfonse finally finds it in himself to speak again. “Zacharias…”

He knows he’s too transparent, knows the others can see the tears in his eyes, but he can’t find it in himself to care. “Could I… have a moment?”

Even with the mask, he can easily see Zacharias’s immediate doubt. He can’t blame him; he’s afraid too. Afraid Zacharias will lose control, afraid of the curse- but he is not afraid to die, if it is at Zacharias’s hands. 

Death is no stranger to him, after all- he is more afraid for how it will hurt Sharena and Anna, and Kiran, now, than himself. Still, he is aware how foolish it is to leave himself alone with the curse so present and Zacharias so volatile.

He doesn’t care. After all this, he still trusts him.

“Alfonse, I am not sure if…”

“ _ Please _ ,” he breathes, and he knows Zacharias can hear his voice break.

_ Please let me talk to you. Please promise me you’ll make it through this. Please don’t let yourself get hurt. Please come back to me. _

“Alfonse, he’s right-” Sharena pipes up worriedly, but he turns to her and something in his eyes makes her trail off, expression softening. He’s aware he must look a little desperate, any composure he might have had completely gone and his eyes still wet with tears. She sighs and nods.

“Not out of our sight, all right?”

He offers her the best smile he can muster, a silent thanks all he can offer at the moment, and she grins back despite the exhaustion behind her eyes. Gods, she’s so much stronger than him, so much more adept at hiding how badly she is breaking. He wishes he could be as much of a pillar to her as she is to him- she deserves a far better older brother.

Zacharias sighs. “Alfonse, I know you, and I know you trust me, but you-”

“ _ Zacharias _ .” He’s surprised by the fierceness in his own voice, but it shuts Zacharias up. He pauses for a moment, then nods.

“Very well. If I so much as  _ move- _ ”

“I trust you.”

He bites his lip, but allows Alfonse to lead him a few paces away, just out of earshot of the group.

“I’m not certain how much time I have left until the curse overtakes me. But I- I owe you  _ far _ more than an apology, Alfonse.” Zacharias sounds like he’s wavering too, like beneath that mask his eyes are swelling with tears. Alfonse can’t attempt to disguise his own tears at this point, but tries his best to push through it.

“I’d forgiven you months ago,” he breathes, reaching for Zacharias’s hand. Hurt lances through him when he flinches away.

“Could- could you take off the mask, Zacharias?” The request has Zacharias’s mouth hardening again, but he knows him well enough to see the faint tremor.  _ He wants to _ , he realizes.  _ But he won’t. _ Not on his own, when he wants to keep his distance at all costs.

“I’m not sure if that’s the best of ideas, Alfonse. I might-”

“I want to see your face.” He’s reaching for the mask before Zacharias can say anything more, standing on tiptoe just to reach the corners. He stiffens when Alfonse slides gentle fingers through his hair, but doesn’t move otherwise as he pulls the mask off completely. Alfonse’s breath hitches when he can finally see the eyes that he’s missed so much, and he can’t help but lay the mask down and cup Zacharias’s face again with his hands.

His brow furrows, but otherwise he does not protest. He looks so sad, so  _ tired _ , so very far from the Zacharias he had loved before he disappeared. “Alfonse…”

“Zacharias.” His voice is shaking, but Zacharias’s breath hitches nevertheless. “Promise me you’ll be okay.”

“I can’t be sure that-”

_ “Promise me!” _ And now he’s sobbing in earnest, but he can’t seem to stop, and it’s overwhelming him and all the months of hurt he’s bottled up are pouring out and oh,  _ gods, Zacharias. _

“Promise me you won’t hurt yourself. Promise me you’ll come back to us!” He bites his lip and searches Zacharias’s eyes desperately for something,  _ anything _ , that might let him know he still cares for him. “Promise me you’ll come back to  _ me _ .”

“Alfonse…” Zacharias’s voice is a whisper, soft but broken, and Alfonse finally finds the answer he’s looking for as he stares back at him with equal intensity. “I- I’ll come back to you. I swear.”

Alfonse can’t take it anymore, and before he can think the better of it he leans in, back on tiptoe, and kisses Zacharias as gently as he can, trying to convey as much feeling as possible with the action. Zacharias’s lips are just as soft as he remembers, and he only stiffens for a moment before relaxing into it and Alfonse knows he hasn’t read the signs wrong. 

He lets himself  _ forget _ and for a moment, it’s just the way it had been before. Zacharias loops his arms around his waist, and Alfonse tangles fingers through hair longer and less soft than he remembers, but it’s still proof Zacharias is  _ alive _ , and it’s all he needs.

Zacharias is the first to pull away, eyes soft and a sad smile curling on his lips again. Alfonse wants to kiss it away, but Zacharias is backing away with a shake of his head.

“I feel the curse awakening again,” he breathes, and his eyes are so, so  _ sad _ , and Alfonse allows himself one last squeeze of Zacharias’s hand before he backs away as well. 

“Are you returning to Embla, then?” he asks. Zacharias nods.

“It is too dangerous for me to remain any longer. But- I’m going to find a way to end this. I’m going to find a way back to you.”

Alfonse blinks back more tears as Zacharias turns away, and before he can stop himself, he’s calling after him. “Please be careful, Zacharias. I can’t lose you again. I-”

It’s too late to regret what he’s going to say, too late to doubt what their years together had meant to him.

_ “I love you.” _

Zacharias turns back to him for a moment, lifting the mask to his face. The look in his eyes knocks the breath from Alfonse’s lungs before the mask settles back over them and he’s met with nothing but the empty golden stare.

“I love you, too.”

And with that, he is gone.

**Author's Note:**

> ahahahaha kill me im choosing to believe they smooched and no one can tell me otherwise least of all intsys ;-; everything is beautiful and nothing hurts
> 
> hmu on twitter @ylissebian or hire a deep web hitman to end my misery over these two forever


End file.
